The final movie in the Crappening and it is a doozy. The guys start off with three very weird shorts that vaguely have a Christmas theme but get progressively weirder. The first some a real old one titled “Santa Claus Story.” Its about a boy and girl who wake up and find Santa. Santa then tells them a story about monkeys and how they celebrate Christmas. This is over a montage of monkeys. WTF??? Monkeys???
Well it gets weirder. The next “Custard the Dragon” has some kids in animal costumes. One in the dragon costume is Custard. Suddenly a pirate that looks like Osama Bin Laden dressed as a football referee comes to steal the presents. Luckily he didn’t count on Custard who proceeds to eat him.
Of course these two are still not the weirdest. The final “Santa’s Village” was a promo short for some Santa village theme parks in California and Illinois that were founded by K. Gordon Murrey the creator of last years Rifftrax gift Santa Claus. The village is populated by Merlin, Stinky the Skunk, and Rapacious Wolf who make accordion sounds every time he walks.
Then we get to the movie. It starts out with Santa on a beach in Florida. His sleigh got stuck in the sand and the reindeer bailed on him. Now he sits in the sun with his soiled pants lamenting the fact that its hot and he’s stuck.
He then uses his powers to summon all the boys and girls in the area for help. Unfortunately the boys and girls prove to be pretty worthless. They brings pigs, goats, horses and a guy in a gorilla suit. None of these can pull Santa’s sleigh free.
So Santa going nowhere gathers the kids and decides to tell them the story of Jack and the Beanstalk. What a traditional Christmas story. Jack’s world seems to consist of mat paintings and polyester clothing. And there’s a lot of groovy singing.(I’m kidding the singing is awful.)Jack of course steals the magic goose and harp.
Finally the movies gets back to Santa. Just when you think there’s no hope what comes driving along but The Ice Cream Bunny in his jalopy. Yeah Santa’s saved the end.
Wow was this movie weird. It had the most threadbare plot I’ve ever seen. It was a perfect choice for riffing on. I have to say that combined with the weird shorts this had to have been the funniest Rifftrax I have ever seen. I can’t remember hearing such laughter as I did last night. This was great way to end their year. You can still catch an encore performance on Tuesday.
So here is a song that sums up the experience.